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Dirty Children Jokes

74 Dirty Children Jokes
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  1. The Cat in the Blender
  2. Herbert the Pervert Likes Sherbert
  3. Fox in Detox
  4. Who Shat in the Hat?
  5. Horton Hires a Ho
  6. The Flesh-Eating Lorax
  7. How the Grinch Stole Columbus Day
  8. Your Colon Can Moo---Can You?
  9. Zippy the Rabid Gerbil
  10. One Bitch, Two Bitch, Dead Bitch, Blue Bitch
  11. Marvin K. Mooney, Get the &@#* Out!
  12. Are You My Proctologist?
  13. Yentl the Lentil
  14. My Pocket Rocket Needs A Socket
  15. Aunts in My Pants
  16. Oh, the Places You'll Scratch and Sniff!
  17. Horton Fakes an Orgasm
  18. The Grinch's Ten Inches






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10 Summer Camps Not For Kids

  • Tommy Lee's----Camp Kickachickee
  • Lorena Bobbit's---Camp Cutaweewee
  • Tanya Harding's---Camp Whackaneenee
  • Kenneth Starr's----Camp Catchacrookee
  • Louis Farakahn's---Camp Killawhitey
  • O.J. Simpson's ----Camp Killachickee
  • Michael Jackson's-Camp Grabbakiddie
  • President Clinton's-Camp Getahoochie
  • Ellen Degeneras's--- Camp Lickacoochie

And The number 1 camp not to send your kid to:

  • Monica Lewinsky's ---- Camp Suckaweewee



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It was a little boy's first day in school and the teacher was going to play a "guessing" game. She passed out different items to each of the students and proceeded to ask each student what item they received.

When it was the new boy, Jimmy's turn, the teacher gave him a candy kiss. She asked "Do you know what it is?" Jimmy replied "No."

The teacher said, "Go ahead and open it up and taste it." Little Jimmy did so. The teacher then asked, "Now do you know what it is?" Little Jimmy said "Nooooo."

The teacher said, "I'll give you a hint...it is something your daddy wants from your mommy every morning before he goes to work." A little girl in the back of the class jumps up and screams

"JIMMY, SPIT IT OUT.......IT'S A PIECE OF ASS!"


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One day the first grade teacher was reading the story of the Three Little Pigs to her class. She came to the part of the story where the first pig was trying to accumulate the building materials for his home. She read, "...And so the pig went up to the man with the wheelbarrow full of straw and said, 'Pardon me sir, but may I have some of that straw to build my house?'"

The teacher paused then asked the class, "And what do you think that man said?"

One little boy raised his hand and said, "I know"..he said 'Holy Shit! A talking pig!'"


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On the last day of kindergarten, the children brought presents for their teacher.

The florist's son gave her a box. She shook it, held it up, and said, "I bet I know what it is. Is it flowers?"

"Thatís right!" said the boy.

Then the candy store owner's son gave her his package. She shook it, held it up, and said, "I bet I know what it is. Is it a box of candy?"

"Thatís right!" said the boy.

Next the liquor store owner's son handed her his box. She shook it, held it up, and noticed that it was leaking. She touched a drop with her finger and tasted it. "I bet I know what it is. Is it wine?"

"No," said the boy.

She touched another drop to her tongue. "Is it Champagne?"

"No," said the boy.

"I give up. What is it?"

The boy grinned. "A puppy!"


74 Dirty Children Jokes
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